Prophet With The Elderly

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Written by Abdul-Rahim Ammar

An elderly might be more experienced, knowledgeable and wise; he might also be richer and more prestigious. However, an elderly may suffer from obvious weakness in one aspect or another of his life.  This might be physical weakness, poor health, loneliness, his need for someone to support him, or any of the many other forms of weakness.  Allah (SWT) has mentioned clearly in His Book what can be translated as, “… thereafter He made even after power weakness and hoariness. …” (TMQ, 30:54).

The Prophet (SAWS) gave special care to the elderly owing to their feebleness.  This is equally clear both in his sayings and deeds.  He (SAWS) says, “One may exalt Allah through showing kindness and respect to the elderly among you, to those who memorized the Qur’an and to a just ruler.”[1]

 

With these tender words, the Prophet (SAWS) confirms the high value of the elderly in Islam.  He mentions them before a Qur’an memorizer and a just ruler; in spite of their great value and high rank.

 

An old man once came to meet the Prophet (SAWS), so the people were a bit slow in making way for him.  Thereupon the Prophet (SAWS) felt pity for him and was merciful to him; he said, “He who does not show kindness to the young ones and respect to the elderly is not among us (Muslims)”[2]

 

I plead with Muslims to relate the incident the Hadeeth above, and to spread the message in it everywhere on earth.  We, as Muslims must teach people how to exalt human rights.

 

The Prophet (SAWS) stipulates in this Hadeeth that anyone who does not have mercy on the young and does not respect the old is not considered a Muslim as he does not act like one, nor does he have the attributes or manners of a Muslim.  Surely, one of the distinguished characters of a Muslim is his mercy to the young and his respect to the old.  I doubt the existence of any law in this world – apart from Islam – that considers one of its fundamentals, the mercy to the young and the respect to the old, such that anyone who does not abide by these is an outsider.

 

Abiding by these morals was characteristic of the Prophet (SAWS) during his lifetime.  Remember how great his words to Abu-Bakr as-Siddeeq[3] were on the day of Conquest of Makkah.  That day, Abu-Bakr brought his father abu-Quhafa, a very old man then, to embrace Islam before the Prophet (SAWS) at al-Ka’aba.  The Prophet (SAWS) told Abu-Bakr, “Why did you not keep the old man at home so that I would have come to him there?”[4]

 

The Prophet (SAWS) was then a victorious leader and a conqueror of Makkah, whilst abu-Quhafa was an old man who embraced Islam after fighting it for twenty years.  Despite that, the Prophet (SAWS) showed him great respect and felt that it would have been more appropriate if he – the great victorious Prophet - had gone to the old man’s place.

 

This is the rank of the elderly in the eyes of the Prophet (SAWS).  Moreover, he would not approve of prolonging congregational prayers which he loved and valued highly.  This was for the sake of not exhausting the old and the unprivileged.  This indicates that the Prophet (SAWS) had a comprehensive view of the meaning of mercy, was broad minded, and had a clear discernment of the nature of Islam.  In fact, he was basically sent as a mercy to people and not for making things difficult for them or causing them to suffer.  All these facts could be perceived if we ponder on one unique incident narrated by abu-Mas’oud al-Ansarei[5].  He said, “A man came to the Messenger of Allah (SAWS) and said, ‘O Allah's Messenger! By Allah, I keep away from the morning prayer, only because so and so prolongs the prayer when he leads us in it.’ I have never seen Allah's Messenger more furious in giving advice than he was at that time.  He then said, ‘Some of you make people dislike good deeds (the prayer).  So whoever among you leads the people in prayer should shorten it because among you are the weak, the old and those with urgent needs.’”[6]

 

What a great attitude!

 

According to abu-Mas’oud al-Ansarei, the Prophet has never been as furious as he was in that incident.  All his anger was not for a grave sin or a crime, but for prolonging congregational prayer!  Such prolongation would be hard for the weak, the old and those with urgent needs, and this is unacceptable in Islam, the religion of mercy.

 

His mercy is in fact wonderful.

 

If this mercy is for the elderly in general, it is surely more becoming with respect to parents.  In the present time, and in many parts of the civilized world, parents do not get their fair share of care and help from their children as they grow older and poorer in health.  But for the Prophet (SAWS), the situation was totally different.

 

A man came to Allah's Messenger (SAWS) and said, “O Allah's Messenger! Who is more entitled to get my good companionship?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." The man said. "Who is next?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." The man further said, "Who is next?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." The man asked for the fourth time, "Who is next?" The Prophet said, "Your father.”[7]

 

Thus the most deserving of a good companionship is not the friend, the ruler, the employer, or anyone else, but the mother and then the father.  The Prophet (SAWS) gave priority to the mother over the father and mentioned her three times because she would be weaker and needier when she gets old. 

 

This is how the Prophet (SAWS) was merciful with parents.  Compare this to what is taking place in the whole world.  Additionally, the Prophet (SAWS) gives emphasis to mercy even in the most difficult and strange situations. 

 

A man came to the Prophet (SAWS) asking his permission to take part in jihad  in the way of Allah (here he meant to fight with non-Muslims). The Prophet asked him, “Are your parents alive?" He replied in the affirmative. The Prophet (SAWS) said to him, "Then make your jihad (strive and exert yourself) in serving them.”[8]

 

Muslims were in great need for someone to fight with them in the way of Allah.  However, and in spite of the situation being so critical, the Prophet (SAWS) did not forget the old parents.  He ordered the man to return to his parents and exert the same effort he was going to pay in fighting, for serving them. 

In his book Fathul-Bary, ibn-Hajar al-Asqalany[9] conveys the opinion of the majority of scholars that jihad in fighting is forbidden if one or both parents keep him, on condition that they are Muslims.  This is attributed to the fact that showing benignancy to them is fard ain (an individual obligation), whereas jihad in fighting is fard kifayah (a communal obligation).[10]

 

A man came to the Messenger of Allah (SAWS) and said, “I came to you to give the pledge of allegiance to you on emigration, and I left my parents weeping.  The Prophet (SAWS) said, “Return to them and make them laugh as you made them weep.”[11]

 

O Messenger of Allah!  How merciful you are!

 

The man came intending to give the pledge of immigration to the Prophet (SAWS), and in such a serious situation, the Prophet was caring not only for making the man’s parents satisfied, but also for making them laugh and happy.

 

This was how he regarded the elderly of his nation. He cherished and valued the duties towards them, and this was his view about mercy.  If there is someone in the world who would claim that his law bears resemblance, even if it were minor resemblance, to the law of the Prophet (SAWS), then definitely there will be no one on earth who could claim that he applied in reality what the Prophet (SAWS) had applied of mercy, clemency and care for human rights.

 

Allah’s Words are true as He (SWT) says what can be translated as,

“And in no way have We sent you except as a mercy to the worlds.” (TMQ, 21: 107).


 
[1]    Abu-Dawood, 4843. Al-Bukhary: Al-Adab al-Mufrad, 357. ibn-abu-Shaybah no. 21922. Al-Bayhakei no. 2685.  In Majma’ az-Zawa’id (The Collection of the Extras), al-Haythamei said, “Narrated by at-Tabarany in al-Awsat (The Middle), in it abur-Rahman ibn-Sulaiman ibn-abul-Jawn, authenticated by ibn-Hebban and Duhaym, and weakened by abu-Dawood and others, and the rest of its narrators are trustworthy.  al-Albany listed it as good Hadeeth in Sahih al-Jami’e, 2199.
[2]    At-Tirmidhy no. 1919,  Ahmad no. 6733, al-Hakem no. 209, al-Bukhary: Al-Adab al-Mufrad no. 358, at-Tabarany: Al-Kabir (The Big) no. 12276 and al-Albany listed it as authentic in Sahih al-Jami’e no. 5445.
[3]    One of the closest companions to the Prophet (SAWS).  He was named as-Siddeeq (The Veracious) because he was known for his truthfulness and some relate that he was named so because he always believed the Prophet (SAWS).
[4]    Ahmad no. 27001, ibn-Hebban no. 7208 and al-Hakem no. 4363.  Shu’ayb al-Arna’ut said, “Hadeeth with a good chain of transmission”.
[5]    Abu-Mas’oud al-Ansarei is from banul-Hareth ibnul-Khazraj.  He was the youngest of the companions to witness the Pledge of al-Aqaba.  He died in the year 41 or 42 A.H.
[6]    Authentic Hadeeth, narrated by al-Bukhary in the book  of “Congregation and Leadership in Prayer” no. 670. Also by Muslim no. 466, ad-Daremei no. 1259, ibn-Khuzayma no. 1605, ibn-Hebban no. 2137, at-Tabarany, 560 and ibn-abu-Shaybah no. 4567.
[7]    Authentic Hadeeth, narrated by al-Bukhary in the book  of “Manners” no. 5626. Also by Muslim no. 2548,  ibn-Majah no. 3658, ibn-Hebban no. 434 and abu-Ya’lei no. 6092.
[8]    Authentic Hadeeth, narrated by al-Bukhary in the book  of “Jihad and Marching” no. 2842. Also by Muslim no. 2549, abu-Dawood no. 2529, at-Tirmidhy no. 1671, an-Nasaei’e no. 3103, Ahmad no. 6544, ibn-Hebban no. 318 and al-Hakem no. 2501.
[9]    Ibn-Hajar: Ahmad ibn-Ali ibn-Muhammad al-Kanany al-Asqalany (773 A.H – 852 A.H). He is one of the scholars of history and science, originally from Asqalan in Palestine, was born and died in Cairo.  Of his famous books is Al-Isaba fi Tamyeez as-Sahabah (The Correct Book in Distinguishing the Companions of the Prophet) and Fathul-Bary fi Sharh Sahih al-Bukhary (The Initiator's Guidance in the Interpretation of Sahih al-Bukhary).  Al-A’lam by az-Zarkalei 1/178.
[10]  Fard Ain (an individual obligation) is a duty enjoined on every Muslim and remains so even if other Muslims perform this obligation.  An example is the five prayers which are obligatory on every Muslim.  On the other hand, fard kifayah (a communal obligation) is a duty, which when some Muslims carry on and fully satisfy its requirements, becomes abolished and is no more enjoined on others, e.g. the funeral prayer.
[11] Abu-Dawood no. 2528, an-Nasaei’e no. 4163, ibn-Majah no. 2782, Ahmad no. 6490, ibn-Hebban no. 7250, al-Hakem no. 7250, al-Bazzar no. 2409, who added, ‘and refused to give him the pledge’, and al-Albany said, ‘Authentic’.

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