Our children and steadfastness to uprightness
Sunday, 11 September 2011
Written by Islamstory
Allah, Almighty, has created people
with varied physical, mental and emotional abilities. This variance in people’s
nature and achievements is due to variance in the strength of their will and
determination as well as clarity of their objectives and aspirations.
The family plays an important role in strengthening the individuals’ will, as it is the fortified haven today amidst turbulence and educational problems. This necessitates man to have more control over his desires in addition to the necessity of working harder.
We live in a difficult age that imposes several duties and requires a strong will, vitality, and efficient performance. As soon as the children reach the age of ten, they are no longer under the supervision of their parents all the time.
In such a case, the children will face countless influencing factors and conflicting currents outside the house, which means that the possibilities of being affected by such factors (positively or negatively) are very high.
These factors include playmates and schoolmates who can play a great role in attracting the child who lacks the familial immunity to all forms of wrong behavior and deviance.
Moreover, the communication revolution in the form of the Internet and satellite channels with their irresistible attraction requires us to guide our children and help them have a strong will and determination and define their goals in spite of all the obstacles on the way to defining them clearly.
To achieve this end, we have to follow these practical steps that lead to developing a strong will and determination:
1- Teaching our children that uprightness and adherence to the Commandments of Allah, Almighty, require resisting one’s fancies and desires. Allah, Almighty, Says (what means): {Then We put you, [O Muhammad], on an ordained way concerning the matter [of religion]; so follow it and do not follow the inclinations of those who do not know.} [Quran 45:18]
They should also know that surrendering to laziness and indiscipline could have negative consequences. That is why the Prophet, sallAllahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allah exalt his mention ), taught us to seek refuge with Allah, Almighty, against laziness and disability twice every morning and evening saying: “Allahumma 'inni 'A'oothu bika minal-hammi walhuzn, wal'ajzi walkasal, walbukhl, waljubn, wadhil' 'id-dayni waghalabatir-rijaal. ('O Allah, I take refuge in You from anxiety and sorrow, weakness and laziness, niggardliness and cowardice, the burden of debts and from being overpowered by men.')”
To instill this conviction deeply in our children’s minds, there should be continuous follow-up and guidance in addition to strong determination on the part of educators and parents.
2- We should teach our children to confirm the strength of their will by considering their ability to finish what they have started. That is because the one with a strong will obliges himself to complete the work to which he has committed himself. Hence, if he decided to memorize a page of the Quran every day or read thirty pages of the Quran every day, or to learn a certain skill, he will continue as preplanned.
This is the guidance of the Prophet, sallAllahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allah exalt his mention ), who used to finish what he started. ‘Aa’ishah may Allah be pleased with her said: “When the Prophet sallAllahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allah exalt his mention ) observed (a voluntary) prayer, he used to establish the prayer that he performed (that he would continue to observe any prayer that he would perform.) ” [Al-Albaani: Saheeh]
3- We have to be gradual in our attempt to strengthen our will. For example, we should start by asking the young child to do easy things exactly as required from him and then we should gradually move to more tasks that are difficult. That is because this is the best way to acquire new habits.
4- We should teach our children that seeking the Help of Allah The Exalted and supplicating Him are indispensable for achieving our wishes in this world and the Hereafter. The Prophet, sallAllahu `alayhi wa sallam ( may Allah exalt his mention ), used to supplicate to Allah, Almighty, saying: “O Allah! I beg You to grant me steadfastness in religion and strong will [to adhere to the path] of righteousness.” [Al-Albaani: Saheeh]
We should also habituate our children to read the biographies of the great people who achieved the best successes drawing their attention to the fact that great success always requires a firm will.
5- If we find that the child does not finish the work he starts, then this is a sign of weak will and here we must help him to strengthen his will. This may happen through devising a program that helps the child get rid of his bad habits and replace it with good ones. Any program depends on supporting and strengthening will and determination.
Finally, dear parents and educators let us lend a helping hand to our children to make them develop a strong will, firm determination and steadfastness on uprightness.
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